The service love language is rooted in making life easier for the person you love. Cleaning the kitchen, raking leaves, or anything else is the best way to say, "I love you." The worst thing to do? Just sit there watching tv, talking, or reading while they work, or always do your own thing.
This is a love language that I definitely appreciate. Coming home to a clean kitchen or realizing that someone has cleaned the house fills me with a sense of gratitude, simply because they care. Ironically, I give off the "I don't need anything in my life, so don't ask" vibe, according to my friends, and I probably won't be able to think of anything I need... so getting up the courage to offer service and finding something to offer is pretty hard. But if you can find a way to serve me, I'll remember it and feel your love forever.
I have friends with this love language, and I have to consciously tell myself that I need to find things to do with them while we are spending quality time together. But I actually don't feel any of the ill effects of this language. If you show your love to me in other ways - even just talking to me while I clean for hours on end - I'll still feel loved.
Receiving - Good. I appreciate the service that others give me - random or personal. It warms my heart and inspires me to serve others with the time and effort they have given me so freely.
Giving - Great. This is my fallback language when I don't have a close enough relationship to profit from quality time. And I've realized, in loving people through this language, that much of my need is actually to love others - to just being loved by them. And serving them helps fill my need to love.
Different for guys? No, except that I find myself serving guys more often because it takes longer to develop a relationship with quality time. But, over time, it works out - and I feel great - loved and able to love.
I'm autistic, ex-bipolar, and attracted to other guys (gay/SSA/whatever). More importantly, I'm a son of God and faithful member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons). My life is usually amazing. This is my story of hope, happiness, and faith.
Thursday, February 24
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This has no relevance to this entry and I haven't had a chance to read all of your posts as I just found out about you today, but I just wanted to say that you are awesome. Really, you are. I can't think of a better way of putting it. I'm just blown away by your faith in spite of everything you face. You are truly an example of the believers in everything you do. Thank you, from the bottom of the heart of a complete stranger. Thank you.
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